Journal - Memories that Changed us

As I was going over photos of Timothy with my sister, tears wanted to trikle down. I was looking at my precious son, how beautiful he really was and now his existence on this earth-gone.  My son is gone. I could never have him back. I could never relive those years with him again.

I was finally able to get the DVD's of Timothy that was transferred from the VHS. I haven't looked at them yet, but know when I do, it will be difficult. Very difficult. I am going to make a "documentary" of Timothy for his Anniversary date for family and hope they will cherish of what I am about ready to share with them.  Its just not about Timothy.  Its what they could had with him if they had made the effort. I'm talking I guess more of his fathers side, and some of my side of family. Not all, as I know there are many who did make the effort, while there are others who missed that opportunity to know a wonderful person.

It is sad that most chose to walk away from Timothy. They really don't know what they missed- not just what but mostly who. I hate that many used me as an excuse.  I wonder on Judgment day if they are going to use me as an excuse...lol  I already know what God is going to say...lol

I also want to put something together for his brother/sister. 

Anyhow...Timothy really wanted to meet his brother and sister. That was his one dying wish and his father rejected it. Denied it. Because of his selfish act, not only did Joshua and Samantha didn't have the chance to meet the best-est brother ever, but Timothy didn't get to see or hold onto what he always wanted- his brother and sister.  How dare  Victor take away from Timothy what he wanted so bad. how selfish of him.  And it is that he will have to answer God to.  And one day Joshua and Samantha will learn the truth about how their father kept them from their brother and didn't even care what Tim's dying wish was. After all he was like this to Timothy, can you imagine what he may be like to them-if they get an ailment? Will he reject them like the way he rejected Timothy once Tim was diagnosed.  The truth about how evil works, ha?

Why? because Timothy was not "perect" in his eyes. Let me tell you something Victor Manual Lopez, TIMOTHY WAS PERFECT IN GOD'S EYES.  and guess what we live in an IMPERFECT WORLD that is what Jesus came down to die on the cross for Timothy. Joshua and Samantha and even your wife and brothers and parents - whom who ALL IMPERFECT including you!!!   All of us are!   If we were all perfect Jesus would had not had to suffere the way He did nor would he had to die on the cross for us.  But one day it will come to bite you in the ass!!

Mean while - all the rest of us (who lives in a perfect world...lol) will have the chance to remember Timothy...his cuteness, his adventures, his love for God and even his death. But we are also going to learn and cherish to why God put Timothy in our lives, and how much of a blessing he was to us.  

As family, we need to create precious memories and hold onto those memories and when we look back at least when we cry, we will have a good reason to why we cry.  The memories that changed us.